Life can feel like it’s a permanent race – at home, at work, in our society and across the globe. When Trump says  “America will start winning again”, he means others will lose. In the UK, we too are embarking on a new era of national self-interest. Decades of building international alliances, of striving to tackle global challenges together, are now unravelling as we enter the global race, even as it’s not clear what prize we’re striving for. Whatever we think we might win, it seems likely we’ll fail. In David Lammy’s words, on the post-EU world stage “other countries will hold a gun to our heads”.

Is life a zero-sum game? Do we need to do better than others to succeed, to be happy?

The reasons for the recent rise in national self-interest are clearly complex and have been analysed extensively. They include feelings of disenfranchisement amongst large sections of society, economic hardship and poor economic prospects, and a resentment of the “liberal elite”. Finding comfort and safety by turning inwards is not difficult to understand, both psychologically and politically. The sense that we can only win at the expense of others, that something has to give, is part of this, and the last year’s political discourse and rhetoric reflect this. It is perhaps not surprising, therefore that Trump’s “Let’s make America great again” had stronger appeal than Clinton’s “Stronger Together”, which has been widely derided.

In the UK self-interest as a significant societal force was crystallised and legitimised with Margaret Thatcher’s “There is no such thing as society”. Ironically, back then around 60% of us thought most other people could be trusted. Now the figure is 30%. Recently and in a perhaps more nuanced way than Thatcher, Theresa May has painted a vision of “meritocracy” based on “talent and hard work” with selective education a key plank, without acknowledging the inherent privilege of talent or defining “hard work”, let alone defining the desirable balance between talent and hard work.

The common theme here is that we will be better off if we look after ourselves first, and that life pits us all against one another, both domestically and internationally.

This attitude towards life and those around us is reflected in our personal sphere, at home and at school, which can be breeding grounds for comparison and competition. “Who can get dressed the fastest?” may seem like a clever strategy to stop toddlers dawdling, but don’t be surprised if five years’ down the line they start counting and fighting over the number of chips on their plates. At school, children notice who is picked to submit their artwork to a competition, who is in which set or on which team. Parents who revel in their children’s superior achievements, online or otherwise, are a normal part of life. Class reunions intimidate many of us but we still buy into the need to share only our perceived successes and triumphs, curated carefully through our social media identity. We are taught that winning is the goal and we are obsessed with comparison. We take for granted that this will involve losers, that “different” most likely means better or worse. Identifying hierarchies gives our world stability and structure and can develop identity and belonging. It can create excitement. Children love to discuss their favourite contestants on TV shows, their favourite foods, animals or colours, and they demand that we name ours.  They dismiss any attempts to suggest that different candidates can be valued equally for different reasons.

Is there a connection between Trump and our competitive daily lives? I don’t know. The issues are too complex to yield to simplistic analysis. But I do know that there is much evidence to suggest a different approach across many spheres of life could change things for the better.

Through this website and blog I hope to explore and promote the idea that we don’t need competition, that it is not inevitable; that cooperative approaches can make us happier, and that seeking and overcoming our own personal challenges and goals and valuing difference, rather than winning against others, can make us more fulfilled, and ultimately create a better society for all.